Archive | leaving marks RSS feed for this section

After the Social

16 Jul

After the ice-cream social, which was lots of fun, i thought Sir would take the grandkids home, come back, and we’d spend a quiet evening side-by-side on our computers.  

Usually, He reads the news, or watches a movie, i look at facebook or blog or answer email.  We chat.  It’s lovely.

That’s not what happened last night.  Instead, i get a text:

“You should put on the white shirt.  White panties.  Tie your hair back.”

And then, seconds later:

“Blister your butt.”

Re-energized, i rush off to shave and get ready.

The panties are white, and not sexy, they’re little girl panties, silky material, a tiny bit of lace around the waist, but not bikinis or even cut hi.  

He takes me to the basement.  He has already prepared the coffee table.  There’s a pillow on it, and then the workbench is pushed up to it, a quilt draped over it all ~ it is clear that i will be kneeling on the table, bent over the bench.  

But not right away.

First, He puts the cuffs on.  Collar first.  The wide leather collar, so heavy i am always a little aware of it.  Wrists.  Ankles.  

“Lie down,” He says.  “Go on.  Face up.  Head on the pillow.  Feet right here.”

He binds me to the coffee table.  Arms at my sides, knees bent, feet apart.  i am completely comfortable.  And completely secure.

And then things begin to happen.  i don’t think i can say them in the right order.  i don’t know anymore.

i am still in that space a bit, you know, where it’s all a blur and when He touches me, it’s like electricity shooting through me and i melt and want to touch Him for a long time, and kiss Him and…

anyhow

you know, that head space.

So here are the things i remember ~~

the shoe horn, He used the shoe horn, between my legs, yes, right there, and it hurt but not too much, and on the inside of my thighs too, holding one thigh down so i’m open and exposed, slapping it ~

And the wooden spoon, on my breasts, the back of it landing on my nipples and

He takes my panties, the white panties, and holds them up, “Nice,” He says, and He folds them in half.  i wonder why, i’m watching, all bound to the coffee table,  but He folds them again, and again.   In fact, He rolls them up.   

“Open your mouth,” He says.

What?  i’m ~ i think i still don’t believe it ~ i open my mouth, and He does it, he sticks them in my mouth.  

“Can you talk?”  He asks.

“Mmm” i say.

He smiles.  “The answer is No.  Good.”

They’re not uncomfortable, and i don’t drool, and i think, i don’t have a safe word, or a safe signal ~

but i’m not worried about it at all, i just notice it.

There’s the cane-nipple-clamp thingy, He puts that on, and it’s not too bad because He leaves it unclipped in the middle, He just clips it at the ends, but it’s still intense.

And then He goes upstairs to get something, and i’m alone and He turns off the lights on His way up, and i’m tied and helpless, gagged, nipples clamped, and i think i should be scared but i’m not…

and He comes back with The Phallus.

i’m glad i can still moan and make a little bit of noise.  i whimper and twist and squirm, opening and accepting ~

at some point there’s ice water, dripped onto me ~ i don’t remember when ~ and maybe other things that are lost to me now ~

And then later, much later, i think, He unties me, takes out the panties.  

i have no urge to talk.  i’m glad my mouth is not full but i don’t need to talk.  

i am so deep into submission, i have no will of my own.

He clips my ankle cuffs together, shackled, i could not leave if i wanted to, not that i want to, but ~ He helps me stand and ~

“Kneel,” He says, “Up there, yes, right there ~ on the pillow ~”

and i do, i manage to get up on the coffee table, kneeling and i already know to bend over the work bench, which is higher, so i’m perfectly comfortable, only i think that won’t last long ~

and it doesn’t.

“Count,” He says.  “Count quietly, but don’t lose track.”  

And He starts.

It’s the cane.  Of course.

It whistles, and lands, and He does it over and over in the same area.  i’m sure it will mark me.

And i’m counting, thinking hard about the number, i don’t want to forget, and

then He asks, and i know, it’s 18, Sir, and He goes on and

~ it’s 29, Sir, and by then it hurts a lot, a whole lot, and at 35, i’m jerking before it lands, twitching, cause i know it’s coming, and i want to avoid it.

“Relax,” He says, and of course, i can’t, but He strokes and caresses until i do and then ~

~ when i am nicely relaxed again ~

Whoosh!  

And it lands again.

YIKES!

42.  We are at 42 when He stops, and i can feel the welts on my ass before He touches them. 

42.

And them i am pleasing Him, with my mouth, and there is nothing else on earth i’d rather be doing.  He gives me a pillow, and i can make myself comfortable, and take my time and 

it is heaven.  

After ~

i am too spaced to think, and He tucks me in bed.  

He tells me the white shirt is mine now, and my responsibility, and i may need to iron it, but He wants it crisp and ready to wear at all times.   i laugh and say i’ll take it to the dry cleaners, but He frowns, and shakes His head. He says when He unbuttons it, He wants to think about me taking care of it, not some girl at the dry cleaners.

Chastened, i know He’s right.

When He comes to bed, i don’t know when, but He touches me, and i am alert and completely aroused, it is like electricity.  i whimper and try to rub against Him, like a cat in heat,

but He only plays with me for a little bit, and then He takes my wrists in His hand and i already know He’s done.  He holds me tight, pressed to Him, and i fall back asleep.

This morning, i am still half gone, still half there in that space where only He is real, and the space between my legs, which belongs to Him, and my heart, which is His too.

i was afraid He did not want to dominate me, and instead He has taken me completely, deeper into subspace than i’ve ever been, lost in longing to serve Him, and i wonder ~

will i bounce out of this, or will He keep me here in this space forever?  Will there be a crashing subdrop?  A slide back into the other side of reality?  

i don’t know, all i can do is trust Him, and trust myself, that we will find the right way for us.

Tags: , , , , ,

Mindfulness Payoff

6 Dec

Tomorrow is the 2nd annual kinky virtual cookie exchange, not that the cookies will be kinky, at least mine won’t.  i’m coming home early tonight to bake, so i can post pictures in the morning.  

Baking cookies makes me feel ever so domestic, and might explain my sudden enthusiasm for cleaning and organizing.  My housekeeper comes today, so i need to post quickly and straighten the house.  

i also need to finish a post for a vanilla blog i write for sometimes.  So it’s no wonder i’m not finding a deep thread of kink for this post.  My mind is not very mindful.

Ok, so here we go.  Breathing mindfully now…

Looking for my inner kink…

Ha.  There she is.  Quietly curled up in a corner of my psyche, waiting for my Sir to wake her up.  Like Sleeping Beauty, i suppose.

He has promised that Wednesday night He will make up for not having thoroughly spanked me Saturday night.  Just thinking of that, my kinky self stirs.  Stretches a little.

i know how His hands will feel on my body.  Never rough, never rushed.  Gently, He guides me in the ways He wants.  Moving my body to please Himself.

Not to say He doesn’t inflict pain, He does.  My nipples harden just thinking about it.  My ass tingles.

He says that i will feel the spanking still on Thursday morning.  

That worries me a little.  i have not come close to that, i think He will have to spank me much harder than He has for the sensation to linger that long.

It worries me  a little, and makes me wet, all at the same time, of course.  

As He says, there are things i know will happen, things that are the same, and things that will be different each time we’re together.

i trust that He will bind my hands.  Bind my hands, and pinch my nipples hard enough to make me gasp.  Thinking of it now, a shiver runs through me.

i trust that He will tug on my hair, let me kneel between His legs, let me take Him in my mouth.

He is training me, slowly and certainly.  Teaching me to respond the way He wants me to.

Sometimes, i want more.  More protocol, more rules, more pain, more everything.  i want Him to hurry up and do it all.

Then i remember to slow down.  i’m not in control here, and there is no hurry.  He will take me where He wants me to be.  It is not too hard to do this with Him.  

i am confident that He is taking me somewhere.  Being able to savor where i am is the payoff for mindfulness practice.

Being able to savor the moment, and heightened arousal.  When i  touch myself ~ not the wetness between my legs, but the soft underside of my wrist, my inner thigh ~ when i touch myself there, i feel sensually alert.

And now that my inner slut is wide awake and ready, i feel my palms tingle.  My heart is open, all my senses attentive.  All revved up and ready to ~~~

~~ straighten up my messy house so my housekeeper can clean.

Hmmm.  Not as sexy as i might wish…

That’s ok.  The energy is mine, no matter where i put it.  It builds and grows and Wednesday, it will be His.

Tags: , , , , ,

Not THAT Nice

25 Sep

i’m a little concerned that i’ve given you the wrong impression of Sir.  He is “nice,” but not that nice.  

Last night, we had dinner and did some vanilla stuff, which was great.  He said He’s been thinking about me, and in fact, has made some toys just for me.

Sweet, right?

Yeah, they’re canes. 

Laughing… seriously.  

He was looking at the information on Kinky Kollege and saw a  lot of stuff about canes.  Did some research and discovered they aren’t always being made with natural material anymore. 

No, they’re often made with some kind of fiberglass.  Which He happens to have a closet full of, because that’s what He uses for His kites.

Yeah.

So He made some canes.  Just for me.  Here they are:

 

 


He has a super skinny one, and a little bit thicker one, then there are some bundled ones.  He’s particularly pleased with the one He put the wooden handle on.  “I think we’ll both really enjoy them,” He says, smiling sweetly.   

Last night, after we get back to my house, He tries each one out on me.  Just once with each one.

Then He says, “O, look at that!  Did i hit you that hard with it?  Whew, that’s a nice little whelp you’ve got there.”

Laughing… thank You, Sir.

Then, as if that weren’t enough, He says “I made another toy for you too, but you’re not nearly ready for this one.  You’ve got a long way to go.”

He pauses to gauge my reaction, which of course is “tell me, tell me, please.”

“Well,” He says.  “It’s for your nipples.  It’s a Japanese type thing, you see it with rope sometimes.  And they use bamboo.  But I thought the cane material would work just fine.”

i say, anxiously, “Yes????”

“And I think it will,” He goes on.  “What it is ~ you take two pieces of it, and tie them together in the middle,  then you do the same thing at the ends.”

He’s gesturing as He describes it, so i can picture it.  The two sticks held together in the middle, so something {guess what} can be placed between them on either side, and then the ends pulled together.

He used a straw, youall.  Cut a straw up to hold the two sticks together in the middle and then to close them off at each end.  Do you see what i’m talking about?

He says we can start out using them without closing the ends, but He wants to use the clamps a few more times first.

Good grief. 

 

 

 

 

 

Tags: , , , , , ,

Discipline (Part III)

16 Aug

“Come on,” says Selena, “You know the drill.  In the shower.”

“Are youall going to do this all week?” i ask, stepping into the shower.  

Diana shrugs, “That depends on you.  At some point, you might earn the privilege of showering on your own.  In the meantime,” she grins, “you’re all ours.”

They wash me quickly, not roughly, but matter-of-factly, and shave me, just as they had the previous night.  Much to my dismay, they rouge me again, my nether lips and nipples, and my mouth.  i cannot imagine appearing like this in front of someone else.

Selena pulls on my nipples, hard, before applying the lipstick, and i feel a responsive twinge in my pussy.  i think i can smell my own juices.  She looks at me for a moment, smiles, before she finishes applying the bright coloring to my hard nipples.

“Who’s coming for dinner?’ i ask.  “Do youall know?”

They exchange a look, i don’t know what it means, but Diana shrugs and says, “Lots of people come to Him for advice on training their sluts.  What difference does it make who it is?”

As she talks, she unlocks the closet door, swings it open.   i gasp.  Hanging on the inside of the door is an extensive array of whips, crops, and floggers..    Selena laughs.  “You hadn’t seen the inside of the closet before?”

i shake my head, “no.”

There are clothes in the closet too, and Diana rifles through them; pulls out a corset.  The most beautiful purple corset you can imagine.  She hold it out to Selena, “This one?”

“Yes, that works, lets see if it fits, i think it will,” says Selena.

“Do you have different sizes?” i ask, wondering what kind of person The Major is.  Does He just kidnap random women all the time?  The thought makes me sad.

“Some different ones,” says Diana.  “They’ve been acquired over the years for parties, from parties.  Some of them are ours.  This one isn’t though.  This one He bought with you in mind.”

She puts the corset on me.  It doesn’t cover my breasts, it raises them, exposes them instead, the nipples pointing forward.  The color they’ve applied tonight has a purplish tinge, the color of the corset highlights it.

Selena begins to lace it, loosely at first, apparently making sure it’s coming together evenly, then Diana helps her as they tug on it, lacing it tightly.  

When they are finished, i am constricted.  i can breathe, of course, but i’m very much encased in the corset, it contains me.

“Now the shoes,” says Diana.  The shoes are purple too, high heeled and strappy.  The straps become laces, and they have me put each foot on a little stool while they criss-cross the laces up my legs, over the calves, finally tying them, rather like this:

Sexy High Heel Strappy Lace Up The Leg Sandal

Between the shoes and the corset, i appear to be all tied up.  They turn me so i can see myself in the mirror.  i am embarrassed and delighted.

The rouge between my legs and on my nipples so clearly draws attention there, and the corset is made to reveal and highlight those parts that we usually keep covered.  My waist, of course, looks slimmer, my legs longer ~ overall, i can’t help thinking i’m a fairly sexy wench.

They put a collar on me then; tonight it is a silver chain, like a dog’s choke collar.  The extra length of it lies in the hollow of my neck, cool and  heavy.  

They had taken off the necklace with the tokens on it, the 3 punishment tokens, but they add the tokens to the collar, dangling each one from a link on the chain.  There are two on one side, and only one on the other.  With little discussion, they agree to add a fourth one “for balance.”

“But,” i can’t help protesting, “But i didn’t do anything, He won’t think “that’s four,” will He?”

Diana rolls her eyes, Selena laughs, “Of course He will,” she says.

A wave of panic sweeps over me, this is so unfair, tears well up in my eyes ~ He will think i’ve been bad, He’ll be disappointed in me, AND omigosh, they could add as many as they like.  There’s nothing i can do about it.  i start to protest, “But that’s -” and i was going to say “not fair,” and i realize that’s ridiculous, this has nothing at all to do with fair.

They’re watching me, waiting, curious.  i don’t even know what expressions flit over my face as i take this in.  i gulp.  Fight back the tears.  Only then do i say, “i hadn’t ~ i hadn’t quite realized.  But of course, yes,   i am ~ i am ~ under your discipline too?” 

“Certainly you are right now,” says Diana gently, pinching my nipple, not so gently.

They finish putting chains on me, on my wrists and ankles.  i am a little dazed, not knowing what to expect next.

At last they are finished, satisfied with their efforts.  They point out the marks left on my ass from earlier, admiring them, and i realize that i agree, they are pretty.  i like the way they look.

“Pinch your nipples,” says Selena.  “Go ahead.  Hard.  Make them stand out.  Yes, just like that.  See how pretty they are?”  i’m embarrassed still, but she’s right, it is pretty.

“He wants to display you, you know,” says Diana.  “That means He’s pleased with you.  Proud of you. Don’t let Him down.” 

They attach the leash to my collar, and lead me out of the room.  Down a hallway, and into the room that is like a study.  He is seated in one chair, and for a moment, i am only aware of Him.  

He stands and they drop my leash, nudge me forward.  The leash dangles, i’m aware of it touching my pussy as i walk toward Him.  Some part of my mind notices the other man in the room, he has stood as well.  But i move toward The Major without a glance in the other man’s direction.

Nervous, hoping i do this right, i raise my lips to His.  Brush them lightly.  Take His hand and caress it with a kiss on the palm.  

i kneel then, and He takes out His cock, allows me to kiss it.  i long to do more, but He puts it away, sits back down.  The other man had already sat back down, and i wonder if he rose as a courtesy, as men sometimes do when women enter the room.  “Stay there,” says The Major, to me, and i remain kneeling in front of Him.

To the other man, He says, “I’ve not trained her to greet others yet.  That will come later.  And what you don’t want to do, what i wouldn’t do, is tell her to do something before I’m sure I have her unquestioning obedience.”  

He gestures to me then, motioning for me to come closer, and when i do, He allows me to sit at His feet, the corset keeps me from curling my body quite the way i’d like to, but i am as close to Him as i can get.  “Good girl,” He says.

And my heart is filled with joy.  My pussy throbs, i grin at Him, and a shiver runs through me.  Right here is exactly where i want to be.

Tags: , , , , ,

The Major (Part IV)

31 Jul

A shiver runs through me at her words, and i stay where i am, on my knees, head to the floor, ass raised in the air.  i hear sounds behind me, maybe a drawer opening and closing, a closet door.  i listen, but have no idea what she’s doing.  

Til i feel ~ something ~ i don’t know what it is – tapping my ass.  It is ~ i think ~ maybe ~ it’s a riding crop?   She’s barely touching me with it, whatever it is.  Then ~~

“This is a crop,” she says.  “Made to be used on horses.  Human flesh is much more tender.”  i hear a whoosh and feel a sharp, burning sensation across the middle of my ass.  i want to jump up and run, but i don’t.  

She brings it down again, hitting right at the top of my thighs, and i cry out this time.  It hurts, hurts, hurts, and i know i’ll feel it there every time i sit.

i’m braced for the next one, but “Breathe,” she says.  “Relax in between.  It won’t hurt as much, and you’ll be able to take more.”

The tip of the crop strokes between the cheeks of my ass, making me gasp in a whole different way.  She laughs.

i begin to breathe again, and try to relax my muscles, and my mind.  Of course, just as i do ~~ 

WHOOSH 

~ it lands again, right between the first two stripes,

“AHHH!  OHHH!”  The pain soaks into my skin, into my flesh.  i’m panting, trying to absorb it.  Just as i do ~ yes, another stroke ~ a little lower on my thighs, and this time i scream.

Then Her hands are on me, she’s kneeling behind me, stroking gently, tracing the welts she’s raised.  i whimper, with pleasure now, mixed with the burning pain.

“Good girl,” she says.  “You took that pretty well.  Good girl.  He will want you to be able to accept pain.”  Her hands stroke gently,  “We’ll stretch you in many ways.”  

i hear her standing behind me, the click of her heels as she gets up.  “But now,” she says, “Get up.  We have work to do.”

***************************************************

In real life ~ i went out last night, stayed out til 1:00 this morning!  Needless to say, i slept in – which is why i’m so late posting ~ goodness, it’s already 9:00!  Day’s half gone… better get moving.

Tags: , , , ,