Waiting, waiting, waiting

8 Jun

Yes, we are still waiting for the baby.  But not just the baby ~ i realized this morning, i seem to be waiting all over my life.

i’m going to be leaving my position at work and starting a new, slightly different, career path.  i leave at the end of this month.  

In August, my daughter and her partner and the baby will be leaving the country.  Shortly after they go, i’m going to visit them for a week.  That way i can take them a couple more bags of belongings, and it will give me a chance to see where they are and feel like they’re settled in.   

My Sir and i are going to start spending more time together.   We’ve been seeing each other pretty much twice a week for about 10 months.  

A while back, after we went to Winter Wickedness (was that in February?)  He started spending the night on Saturday nights.    This Wednesday, He spent the night when we both had to work the next morning.

That was smooth.  And good.  i like waking up with Him.  Holding Him, being held.

He suggests that we spend more time together, and yes, i want that too.

We talk about our kink aspect , the D/s of who we are.  We are on our own path there, just a touch off the beaten path, i think.  Lots to explore and think about.

And i want to rush ahead.  Skim through the “now” to the next chapter.

i want the baby born now.

i want to be started on my new career path (not a new career, just a new path.) 

i want to see my relationship with Sir clearly, know where we’re headed and a step or two of how we’ll get there.

No, i don’t want my daughter and her little family gone, of course not, but i would like to go ahead and know that they’re settled in safely.  

All this uncertainty and up-in-the-air-ness is just a little excessive.   Good grief.  

But just when i start feeling a little overwhelmed and frustrated and like i want to stamp my feet and rush into the future ~~

i remember ~~ 

“Inner peace is impossible without patience. Wisdom requires patience. Spiritual growth implies the mastery of patience. Patience allows the unfolding of destiny to proceed at its own unhurried pace.”
― Brian L. Weiss, Muchas Vidas, Muchos Maestros

 Damn it. 

Okay.

Slowing down again.  Remembering to experience where i am.

Betwixt and between… liminal time… holding myself open… being where i am… remembering to breathe…

Yes.

Okay.

That’s better.  It will all unfold in its own time. 

12 Responses to “Waiting, waiting, waiting”

  1. Jz's avatar
    Jz June 8, 2012 at 9:27 am #

    Well, we all understand the happy impatience.
    But as a friend of mine once declared, “I have GOT to stop wishing my life away! Either that or just change what I’m saying to “I wish I were 87 and dead.””

    Your quote is infinitely more mellifluous.
    But hers makes the point, too, I think. 😉

    Yy

    • olivia's avatar
      aisha June 10, 2012 at 9:13 pm #

      Oh, i think she makes the point beautifully, Jz, thanks for sharing it!!

      yY

      aisha

  2. mouse's avatar
    mouse June 8, 2012 at 11:09 am #

    When good things are happening, we most assuredly want them NOW. It all does require patiences and will to sit back and just enjoy the good times.

    We’re all just sitting with you…In that figurative cyberspace way….

    Hugs (many of them),
    mouse

    • olivia's avatar
      aisha June 10, 2012 at 9:14 pm #

      Dear Mouse,

      i know, and i sure appreciate the company…

      hugs,

      aisha

  3. yesthankyousir's avatar
    yesthankyousir June 8, 2012 at 12:10 pm #

    I am in the place too. Waiting. Thank you for reminding me to be patient.

    • olivia's avatar
      aisha June 10, 2012 at 9:14 pm #

      Hi, Andi,

      Easier said than done, but i think it’s worth working at… thank you.

      aisha

  4. faithful's avatar
    faithful June 8, 2012 at 7:17 pm #

    It’s not about the destination, but the journey. Enjoy Enjoy Enjoy

    ~faithful

    • olivia's avatar
      aisha June 10, 2012 at 9:15 pm #

      Hey, Faithful,

      Yes. It really is. But that’s a hard thought to hold sometimes.

      aisha

  5. sin's avatar
    sin June 8, 2012 at 9:09 pm #

    enjoy the journey…
    -sin

    • olivia's avatar
      aisha June 10, 2012 at 9:15 pm #

      Thanks, Sin! 🙂

      aisha

  6. Fondlers Anonymous's avatar
    Fondlers Anonymous June 9, 2012 at 4:00 pm #

    We all could do with a bit more patience… and I’m still praying for you and the little one to come join this world safely!!

    • olivia's avatar
      aisha June 10, 2012 at 9:15 pm #

      Thank you, FA, i really appreciate your prayers!

      aisha

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